


the things we said sitting still

by kylieno



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Gen, Homesick Lance (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) Has Abandonment Issues, M/M, Shiro (Voltron) is Missing, romance is minimal but still there, takes place early s3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-16
Updated: 2018-11-16
Packaged: 2019-08-24 10:56:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16638599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kylieno/pseuds/kylieno
Summary: Keith can't sleep. Lance is homesick. Talking ensues.





	the things we said sitting still

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, I finally posted this! I actually wrote this little ficlet around a year ago but never got around to uploading it on here. I hope y'all enjoy my first (and probably last, ngl) written contribution to the vld fandom.

It’s nighttime, at least by the paladins’ standards, when Keith steps outside of his room, pulse fluttering in a tempo much too fast for his liking.

The castle is silent, lights dimmed down to their lowest setting. It’s a flimsy imitation of the endless night outside the ship’s bounds, but it’s dark enough that he keeps a hand pressed against the wall as he makes his way down the corridor.

To be honest, he doesn’t know exactly why he’s out wandering the hallways instead of forcing himself into an uneasy rest. Maybe it was the pressing silence of his room, the darkness almost stifling, that compelled him to roll out of bed. Or the ever-present stress wearing him thinner and thinner, an aching pit in his stomach that won’t let him close his eyes for more than a few moments.

Keith pauses, fingertips still touching smooth metal. He’s so fucking  _tired_. He wants to curl up into his blankets, make a cocoon until this pressure in his chest finally ceases and he doesn’t need to pretend that he’s not some lost kid hopelessly trying to lead an army consisting of four other lost kids. But there’s a nervous buzzing inside him, like the surges of adrenaline that flood into his limbs when he fights. It hums beneath his skin, uncomfortable and warm and jittery.

His feet take him further down the hall, dragging on the floor. He just needs to walk it off, burn a little energy, and then he can sleep. Maybe even without being haunted by Shiro’s disappointed, accusing face.

_Why did you give up on me, Keith?_

Keith shakes his head, running a hand through his unkempt hair. Shiro would never say that. Shiro would’ve wanted them to move on and keep fighting, even though the end of it all is nowhere in sight.

Still, those thoughts don’t quell the guilt nagging at him, crawling in his stomach until he feels like he needs to dry heave. He grits his teeth, heart pounding. He isn’t giving up. Not until they find him.

He’s not very surprised to see that his aimless wandering had taken him to the control center of the castle, the expanse of the galaxy vibrant through the large windows. He stares out into the vast darkness, the stars glimmering brighter than the sleeping machinery.

“Keith?”

His gaze drops to a person-sized silhouette on the steps, so still he hadn’t noticed it before.

Lance stands up. Keith sees the outline of his shoulders shift as he shoves his hands in his pockets. “What’re you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same question,” Keith says, watching as Lance moves closer to him. “You went to bed a while ago. Thought you needed your  _beauty sleep._ ”

Lance laughs, but somehow it seems a little hollow. “Losing a few hours here and there won’t lessen my natural good looks and irresistible charm, mullet.”

Despite himself, a small smile plays across his lips.

“I thought we were over making fun of my hair,” He says, and without thinking reaches to touch the locks curling over the nape of Lance’s neck. “Besides, you shouldn’t be talking. It looks like you’re growing one too.”

“Hey!” Lance says indignantly, taking a step back. “I’ll have you know that I would rather eat food goo for the rest of my life than have a stupid haircut like yours. Space barbers are, like,  _really_  hard to find around here.”

“I’m sure,” Keith says. Lance doesn’t reply, and for a moment they just stand in a terribly prolonged and awkward silence.

He swallows. “So really, why are you out here?”

He wants to make it sound right, with concern and leadership coloring his voice in equal measure. To his own ears, it just sounds clumsy and harsh and demanding, nothing like the calm and approachable tone that Shiro had wielded effortlessly whenever he talked to the team. The last syllable dies in his throat, and he swallows.

Lance is quiet a second too long before he shrugs. “Just couldn’t sleep, I guess,” he murmurs, and there’s something so  _sad_  about his tone that catches Keith off guard. He sits back down on the stairs, turning his face to the insurmountable collection of stars outside the window.

“Me neither,” Keith offers, and sits down next to him. Lance doesn’t take his eyes away from the view, and so he shrugs, letting his own gaze wander into the depths of space. They sit like that for a while, no words shared between them. 

“It’s been about a year, I realized,” Lance says suddenly, leaning back. His eyes have adjusted enough to see the wistful expression he carries, staring out the window without really seeing it.

Keith frowns, glancing at him. “A year since what?”

“Since I last saw my family.”

He stiffens, unsure of what to say.

Luckily, Lance fills the silence for him. “I thought I would’ve seen their faces by now. It sucked when I had to move away to go to the Garrison, but at least we could call each other, y’know?”

Keith doesn’t really know, but he nods anyway.

“And now…” Lance looks up to the stars. “I…I wonder how they’re doing.”

“Do you ever want to go back?” Keith knows it’s a stupid question before it even leaves his mouth.

Lance snorts. “Only all the time. Once we’re done with the whole ‘defending the universe’ thing, the first thing I’m gonna do is go back to Varadero.” Keith sees his shoulders slump. “The thing is, I’m not sure how long that’s gonna be. It could be forever.”

He slumps forward, chin tilted into his chest. He looks so…defeated. Keith places a hand on his shoulder, hoping this small bit of comfort can breathe life back into his posture.

“It’s not going to be forever,” Keith says firmly. “We’re going to bring peace to the universe and you’ll get to see your family again, and Hunk will get to see his, and Pidge is going to find her dad and brother.”

“And we’ll find Shiro,” Lance says quietly, turning to face him.

“And we’ll find Shiro,” he echoes. It’s still dark, but he can tell that Lance is staring at him with that strange intensity that he possesses sometimes. He can feel his cheeks become annoyingly warm.

“And then we can go back home.”

Home. Keith wants to scoff, but he settles for scratching the back of his head. “Uh. I’m not too sure about the ‘we’ thing, Lance.”

“Why not?”

“There’s nothing…really…” Keith gestures uselessly in front of him, and Lance nods, like he understands. There’s nothing much to go home to, other than a rickety wooden shack in the middle of a trackless desert.

There’s a lingering silence before Lance speaks again.

“You know…” he says, and Keith can imagine him twiddling his thumbs, looking sheepishly at the ground. “You know, my old house has a pretty nice guest bedroom.”

“Huh?” Keith says, mystified.

“Yeah,” Lance continues, “like, it’s right next to the bathroom and the mattress is to die for, and even though it’s not too big, it’s comfortable, and it has a view of the beach from the window. Sometimes I would spend the night in there, just to look at the sea before I fell asleep.”

“Sounds nice,” Keith says, although still puzzled. Maybe Lance just wanted to…what? Vent?

“Yeah,” Lance agrees, but there’s an unspoken question in the wake of his words.

Keith coughs into his hand, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious. “Is there any particular reason you’re telling me about this?”

“Oh. Uh,” Lance says, and maybe it’s just Keith imagining things but he sounds a little…nervous? “Well, there’s tons of room for an extra person, and I don’t know what you’re planning on doing once we’re all done with this, but…I dunno, if you wanted you could… maybe visit?”

Oh.

 _Oh_.

Keith is  _so_  glad that it’s dark out; his face feels like it’s on fire.

Lance sounds almost as flustered as he feels, and part of him wants to dwell on why but another, more logical side of him doesn’t want to get his far-flung hopes up. “I mean, I would feel bad if you had to go back to that tiny hut, and I– it’d be weird to leave you alone in space while we’re all partying it up back on earth, y’know?”

“You don’t have to do that just because you feel bad for me,” Keith says, folding his arms.

Lance throws his hands up, letting out a frustrated groan. “That’s not what I meant at all!”

“Then what  _do_  you mean?”

“Newsflash: I  _care_  about you, asshole,” Lance says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “And so does the rest of the team. Do you really think that we’d leave you behind?”

There’s suddenly a golf ball-sized lump in Keith’s throat. “Dunno,” he mumbles, the word catching on his tongue. He feels suddenly vulnerable, exposed, like a shell cracked open.

Lance doesn’t say anything, just looks at him with an unreadable expression. Then, without warning, he pulls him into his arms.

“What are you doing?” Keith says, bewildered.

“Take a wild guess,” Lance says, voice muffled against the crook of his neck. “You looked like you needed a hug, and I’ll have you know that I give the second best hugs in the universe.”

“Second best?” Keith asks.

“Behind Hunk,” Lance explains, and Keith can hear the smile in his voice. 

Hesitantly, Keith’s hands find Lance’s back, drawing him a little closer. It feels nice to have someone to hold onto. If he concentrates, he can almost feel the beat of Lance’s heart against his own, steady and reassuring. He closes his eyes and a small, pleased hum leaves his mouth.

“See? I told you,” Lance says quietly. He’s been so much softer around the edges recently, Keith notices. Sweet, even. “I hope you know that we’re here for you, Keith.”

He feels tears stinging in the corners of his eyes, but he doesn’t reply, just melts further into Lance’s embrace. Lets himself forgets about duty, about the pit in his stomach, and the helplessness curling in his chest.

Just for a few peaceful moments, he forgets about everything besides him, and Lance, and the boundless clusters of stars gleaming outside the castle window.


End file.
